New ME3 Fanfic Ending Adds Choice of Squad-mates and Romances.

Straight up, sounds like an update for DRAFT #2, as soon as Sentinel and Engineer classes are represented I'll start on updating the (by then) 200+ pages of text.

yeah, i hope you don't mind, but when that's all done...i want a signed hard cover, lol

Keep it in line with the style and keep it Class and Gender neutral for Shepard and I just might use it. Otherwise I'll just do it on my own when the time comes for the second draft updates.

Ok, I'll consider that. Not a bad idea. See you in 6 months with a Signed Hardcover.

I'll shoot you a PM tomorrow detailing it. I came up with it as the proper representation of Shepard's Indoctrination and that which would make more sense, and very climactic.

You'll definitely get a shout-out on the main-page for the idea too. Draft #2 Updates courtesy of:

may be a bit hard as i live on the opposite hemisphere on the opposite side of the globe in a tiny town 8 hours from the nearest major airport. but the sentiment was nice.

The Fancy Frickin' Ninja Wizard.

Joking. You can use Warden-Commander RavianGale, or Destiny Anne-Marie Puls. Either works.

Yeah, we'll settle for FedEx and the autograph.

FedEx? you mean i'll actually receive a FedEx box!? that is sweet (i'm a lil bizzar, also FedEx doesn't exist here so having a box to show off on facebook would be epic.*joking of course*)

on a more serious note, (although i was joking when i said i expected a signed hardcover copy) i would be deeply honored to receive one, i almost want to stop reading now so i can enjoy the finished product...its just to damn good to put down! stop making good fanfic damn you!

Garrus – “Lets see how he handles the bite of a black widow ten!”

shouldn't over complicate, i for one hated the black widow, i was a javlin kinda guy. just leave it "lets see how he handles the bite of my rifle!" more garrus like anyways...also, Quickly flipping on the Marksman ability , takes away from the reality, call it an amp or something, but not an ability. the book is supposed to take a step back from the game (yes its a game epilogue) but i dont want to "feel" like im still playing whilst reading.

EDI – “Roger Commander"

this isn't EDI, its too firm, EDI is always calm, it should read "Of course commander"

(i know im just being picky now, but hey, jason shepard was an infiltrator too so this feels like my true ending)

Shepard – “You can’t, I’m the only one who brought breathing equipment.”

story is flawed as of here onward, shepards suit was screwed (or did i miss something) i doubt the breathing gear still worked IF he still had it, though i love the mass renegade move (shooting illusive man)

Tali – “I may be leaving but I’m not leaving without a kiss.” (*Paragon romance option. Kiss her. Renegade “Now’s not the time.”)

Tali would die if she took off her mask now, too much death and decay around means too much bad bacteria, low immune system wouldnt cope, i see WHY you wanted to do this and all, but its a major plot hole

With that, all the hours of intense calibration, hardwireing and rerouting are put to good use by a volley from the Normandy’s giant gun.

LOVE THIS PART! it all makes sense now, lol

also i am sorry for ripping into this, i get carried away at times, if i missed any earlier points to explain these, let me know

So sorry that I won't. I can't wait till I'm done updating the Sentinel and Engineer classes and I can focus on really improving the quality of the work. The Good stuff hasn't even begun to come out yet.

Yesterday's updates in a full bulletin:

1. Added Music to the site, and on every Story Ending page.

http://collegeage.wordpress.com/mass-effect-music-page-2/

2. Changed the Front Page layout to be more informative.

http://collegeage.wordpress.com/

3. Rewrote Miranda Lawson's Romance Ep.

http://collegeage.wordpress.com/across-the-distant-shore-a-thane-romance-epilogue/paper-thin-alibi-a-miranda-romance-epilogue/

4. Wrote a letter to Jennifer Hale.

http://collegeage.wordpress.com/2012/04/05/letter-to-jennifer-hale-6-2/

5. The site over Doubled its all time views in 1 day. With 6,337 visits yesterday.

No no, these are actually very helpful critiques. Mass Points to you my friend for being specific and convincing, as well as for pointing out a positive example. This is exactly what an expert criticism should look like. Kind of takes me back to all those classes and workshops for first drafts I went to.

I'll fix these points in Draft #2 of the work. Not soon I'm afraid but coming up definitely none the less.

thanks...and to think i have never critiqued anything before (OTHER THAN MASS EFFECTS ENDING!)

You know, I've written out basic ending scenarios but I haven't given much though to actually writing them as a story. I think I might.

Do so, it's very satisfying.

It certainly can be good therapy, so to speak, getting it out of the system. Seeing it on paper/screen actually can make a difference.

Well, speaking from a personal view, any way, as always.

Thanks that was pretty awesome I picked the Male Soldier one and had Ashley/Garrus with Ashley romance and I loved it. That would be a helluva better ending than what we got now keep up the good work. I accidently picked no in the poll but after reading those I loved them.

Where did you get this awesome Miranda picture?...I wanted to use it as a wallpaper for my computer, but it's too small. Also your fanfic ending for Garrus/Liara (Liara Romance) was great.